he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
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