all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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