I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
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My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
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I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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