I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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