Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
only you would photoshop your dick
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Randomize