very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
When did angry sex become our thing?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize