yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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