He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize