I want to have your abortion
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Are my feet made of real feet?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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