I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
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Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
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$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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