we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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