You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
You're a waste of cheezeits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize