Kiss
Puke
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize