did you get engaged???
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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