I will die if light touches me.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
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