He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize