Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize