im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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