I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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