there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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