You just made me feel so damn special
We got so high we made milksteak
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I think your dad took our porno
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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