he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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