i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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