You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize