do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
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We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
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He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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