So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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