she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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