Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
What a fucking waste of an outfit
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
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If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
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Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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