She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize