Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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