I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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