I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
40s are totally the cure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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