You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize