You really coming over, don't trick.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Drunk is not a location!
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