Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize