Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
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