there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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