I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize