naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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