mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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