I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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