Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
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How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I AM VODKA MAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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