Texts From Last Night

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  (646): View more from New York

  I can't breathe out the right side of my face

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  (646): I can't breathe out the right side of my face http://tfl.nu/2qbr
  Replies (5) Good night (649) Bad night (1887) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.

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  (917): i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again. http://tfl.nu/ig6s
  Replies (35) Good night (549) Bad night (3757) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask

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  (732): I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask http://tfl.nu/8bk4
  Replies (11) Good night (4505) Bad night (540) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.

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  (240): And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender. http://tfl.nu/1lfm
  Replies (8) Good night (6202) Bad night (496) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.

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  (704): It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States. http://tfl.nu/t1qp
  Replies (16) Good night (6359) Bad night (837) Order T-Shirt
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.

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  (605): I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us. http://tfl.nu/gkw5
  Replies (7) Good night (2957) Bad night (810) Order T-Shirt
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.

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  (520): I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again. http://tfl.nu/aob4
  Replies (3) Good night (828) Bad night (2870) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.

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  (510): i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again. http://tfl.nu/nfnb
  Replies (10) Good night (3292) Bad night (775) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  This is the weirdest negotiation ever.

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.

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  (678): This is the weirdest negotiation ever. (814): This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue. http://tfl.nu/rt97
  Replies (1) Good night (1874) Bad night (457)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING

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  (780): let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING http://tfl.nu/vf6d
  Replies (7) Good night (1908) Bad night (510)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?

  (1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

  FUCK YOU MAN

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  (717): Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in? (1-717): FUCK YOU MAN http://tfl.nu/h049
  Replies (3) Good night (1515) Bad night (551) Order T-Shirt
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack

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  (307): FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack http://tfl.nu/bu27
  Replies (2) Good night (588) Bad night (552) Order T-Shirt
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  (972): View more from Texas

  I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.

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  (972): I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls. http://tfl.nu/wzfh
  Replies (9) Good night (2727) Bad night (596)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.

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  (605): I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits. http://tfl.nu/1m96
  Replies (3) Good night (1011) Bad night (318) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.

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  (402): Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night. http://tfl.nu/4fcf
  Replies (3) Good night (1028) Bad night (390)

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