He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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