He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
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I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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