Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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