Say something about gay babies.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too high and old for this...
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize