no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
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