I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I'm too high and old for this...
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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