i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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